It’s so humbling to see your life broken down to a matter of boxes. After packing for a week and moving for a weekend, I have seen my life go from life, to boxes and now, oh so slowly, back to life again. We measure our progress now to “how many” boxes we can empty on any given day. Day 1 Racheal & I emptied 11 boxes for the kitchen. Day 2 I emptied close to 20 unpacking our bedroom & master bath along with some in the office. Day 3 World’s Greatest 8th Grader & I emptied 5 during my lunch break. And I’m sure we have over 20 more to go…I’m ready to be moved in…settled…and rid of boxes.
One of the ways I’m starting over in my life is moving. Since it’s been 90+ degrees and we are moving and preparing for vacation to Holiday World, Racheal & I thought it would be good for us all (all 6 of us: Jayden, Alexia, Kyrah, Anna, Racheal & myself) to get our hair cut. And that’s what we did. Anna & I have the same exact cut. Of course, she is way more cuter than her Aunt! Thanks Kelli – we had a blast!!
Early this morning I noticed a post on Facebook that someone I considered a second mom had passed from this earth to her heavenly home. I knew she was sick and not doing well, but the shock was all the same. This dear lady, Mommy Smurf, was the mom of one of my best friends and became a sister-in-law later in our lives. My mom has been gone for 4 years and 5 months…and yet when I read that Mommy Smurf had passed away, it was as if it was my Mom all over again. I sat at my desk, in the middle of moving chaos and simply cried. I cried for the great memories we had, I cried for my dear sister who is mourning the loss of her mom, and I cried that I would never get to give Mommy Smurf another hug until we meet again.
So here’s to you, Mommy Smurf…may you find peace in life everlasting, may you worship our Lord and may you and Mom rekindle your longstanding friendship and watch over us from above.
The last week I have cleaned, painted, cleaned, spent too much money at Menards, watched new carpet being laid, saw new steps put on my deck, all at my “new” old house. We’ve packed boxes here and I don’t know what I would do without my wonderful World’s Greatest 8th Grader. He’s been a life saver.
As I looked around the living room tonight, I couldn’t believe the feeling of needing to get out of here. This house has always felt “off” for me and I think it’s because it’s my Mom’s house and not mine. I realize that while I love my mom and miss her every day, she would not want me to be so miserable. I have done everything I could to help my Dad and yet it’s still not appreciated or enough. So when the realization that I needed to do nothing but move home hit me in the face today…I felt a sense of urgency to leave…to get out…to move to “my” home.
So today…today I focus on what I need to do for my life and my family…and in the midst of this chaos, I felt peace.
While things have been stressful for a few months, there are some friends who have elbowed their way in the walls I built and took their rightful spot in my life. It wasn’t on purpose that I was shutting people out, but when life is crazy it’s those that come in and help with the crazy that truly are friends. These friends are closer than family.
On June 10, 2012 it will be 18 months exactly since the day I moved my family into my dad’s house to help take care of him, the house and the expenses. My family moved in hoping my dad would get better. I’m happy to say he’s better – physically. I’m discouraged to say that while we have put time, effort and not to mention thousands of dollars into living here, he has (in not so many words, but more in actions) asked us to leave. We have tried to explain how our presence here is needed (he can’t carry water softener salt down the stairs, or pay all the bills, or manage all the house), he seems to have taken a deaf ear. I have tried calmly explaining everything – he says I’m wrong. I have tried being stern and blunt with him trying to explain what it will be like if we move out – he simply looks at me and says “whatever”. WGH & WG8G have long since been ready to move as tensions around the house have been high as my dad thinks we are here to wait on him hand and foot. After dad, very rudely and calously, said it was his house and he would do what he wanted, the decision was made. We are moving back to our home in Bristol. I will no longer be the POA or the executor of his estate and I will no longer feel responsible for him. I have had many people come forth and tell me they can’t believe I have even tried to make this living arrangement work. I did so for my Mom…who I miss incredibly every day…not for anyone else. But even my beloved Mom would tell me enough is enough. My family (WGH & WG8G) are my priority, not my dad. Today, a dear woman of God, Mickie Turner, had on her Facebook, “My Bible verse for today: “And let us not be weary in well doing; for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Galatians 6:9″ I believe God gave her that verse for me. God is saying to me, “Jen, don’t be weary for doing the good thing you did…but now move on and in the end you will reap because you didn’t give up.” All I can say is…”yes Lord, thank You!”
So…May 31 has come and gone. With it my kidlette received 7 awards for his academic achievements and leadership skills. He has made the Principal’s Honor Roll again…his GPA for 7th grade was 3.71. All I can say is – WOW…he’s a good kid!
And now…to earn high school credit, he’s on a Junior High tour of Washington DC. The plan in the Padgett house was to go there as a family this year. But when PMMS sent home information of a school tour, World’s Greatest Mom couldn’t pass it up as it had a full itinerary that would be hard for her to reproduce. So…”X” amount of hundreds of dollars later, World’s Greatest 8th Grader is in DC this week. He’s gotten to go on a live Battleship, on an actual naval destroyer (sorry I have no idea the actual lingo) and gotten to see Arlington National Cemetery today. He’s having the time of his life…World’s Greatest Mom is home…having the longest 4 days of her life. But what’s a little restlessness for Mom…when the World’s Greatest 8th Grader is having the time of his life?